Inner Child Healing

You always try to be everything to everyone. I'm picturing a sunflower of a girl. I wish I could go back in time and tell her: you don't have to be everything to everyone. Some people are just miserable. You're allowed to distance yourself from them. You're allowed to leave them in their own mess. Other people's happiness, girl, is not your responsibility. 

Their desire for you isn't either. 

If I were writing a letter to that sunflower girl, I'd tell her that most humans love to yank a pretty flower right out of the ground and keep it in their own vase - where it serves them alone. It's not your responsibility or obligation to serve anyone. 

In fact, you can bite back.

I'm sorry some people will ever try to take you apart at all, but when that happens, I want you to know that you have the right to feel angry, to get angry, act angry, feel good about your anger. Take out your knives and slash away. Defend yourself, walk away, press charges.

You have the right and you are safe to walk away - a sunflower under street lamps at night.

The road isn't always going to be this dark. That dark.

You will get through. Not better than I did, but feeling safer inside yourself.

And then, sunflower girl, you'll turn 44 and it'll feel lonely and like chaos. You'll spend years trying to remember what makes you special - the special shape of your petals, your unique yellow, your thick, sturdy trunk and beautiful brown eye. Then 47 will come and the sun will come back. You won't have to call it. Your roots will be strong by then, your bloom something you can finally feel safe in and trust.

This came out when I gave my body a voice inside Body Writers, my somatic writing and healing circle. Learn to give your body a voice here.